Expedition to Australia

Author Tony De Maio
Several years ago, the Ford Foundation decided to send a mission to central Australia to assist the Aborigines with medical care. They searched in vain for a person with a background in the language and also a medical background to head the mission.

Finally, the foundation decided to get someone who could speak the language to head the mission, and to retain several doctors to do the actual work. They were successful in creating such a group, and dispatched them to Australia.

They arrived at a village and set up camp. The director talked to the chief and said, “We are here to assist you with your medical problems.” The chief said, “Wonderful, but where are your rattles and shark tooth’s necklaces?” The director assured the chief that such were not needed. The chief replied, “Well, you are certainly welcome here. We can certainly use you.”

Days went by, but no one came for medical treatment. The doctors waited in vain, playing cards and other games to while away their time. The director went to many meetings with the chief, the shaman, the elders, and the tribal leaders and told them all the wonderful things medicine could do for them. The leaders all agreed that the white man could do wonderful things.

The tribal shaman, being very busy, took on an apprentice to assist him in doing his work. Many of the members of the tribe were ill in their huts from polluted water, improper disposal of sewage, and other similar causes. These people did not know of the white man’s powers–they just knew that the shaman was too busy to see them.

One day, an elder came to the doctor’s camp. The elder asked the director if the white man could help him build a house for his daughter who was about to get married. Having nothing better to do, the director agreed, and assigned two doctors. The doctors felt somewhat ill at ease at such a task, but had no response to the director’s statement, “You’re not doing anything anyway. They built a fine house (hut), perhaps the best in the village. All marveled at the construction and beauty.

Soon, more men approached the director to build houses. Again the doctors responded. The director wrote a glowing report to the Ford foundation stating that close communication had been established and the natives were asking for assistance.

Then, one elder asked the director if the white man knew how to dig a well. The doctors dug a new well. Soon, they were approached by many villagers to dig several new wells–which they did. The director wrote a glowing report to the Ford Foundation describing how successful efforts had been made to obtain an uncontaminated water supply to replace the polluted supply that had been in existence; and how disease had dropped 10%.

The director was quite satisfied with the successes of the mission. Morale among the doctors was low, but no one could quite define just WHY it was low. Certainly, they were “doing good” and “helping the villagers”. They were certainly not overworked.

The director then noticed that the sewage disposal “system” in the village was quite primitive–in fact there was none. He put the doctors to work digging latrines and then showing the natives how to use them. Disease in the village dropped 40%. When a doctor complained about the type of work he was doing, the director told him that there was little else he could do that would drop the disease rate so much; that this was the REAL practice of preventative medicine. The doctor had to agree, but still complained sufficiently to where he had to be reprimanded. The director wrote a glowing report to the Ford Foundation stating that the doctor’s efforts had reduced disease by 40%.

Then, one day, the chief’s daughter got sick-”a little tummy ache”. It got worse, and the chief took his daughter to the shaman. The shaman did his best, but could do little. The devils were too deeply entrenched to be exorcised. If the chief had only come a bit earlier, he might have done something; but there was nothing he could do at this time.

In desperation, the chief took his child to the director. The director called in the doctors and they examined the child. There was consensus that it was appendicitis, and an operation would have to be performed. The chief, having nothing to lose and being assured that the operation was simple, gave approval.

The patient was made ready, and the surgeon began the operation. Much to the surgeon’s horror, he found that his hands were so calloused they were incapable of gripping the instruments properly; and that he was incapable of executing the fine motor movements necessary to perform the operation.

He had no choice but to continue the operation. Fortunately, although the operation was “not the best”, the patient was young and healthy and recovered. It was clear to all that the doctor would never perform another operation.

The director wrote a glowing report to the Ford Foundation stating that his work here had been accomplished, and it was time to send in another team to continue the good work. He also stated that it would be his pleasure to serve on another team of a similar nature if the Ford Foundation should so desire.

The Ford Foundation evacuated the team, paid them, and sent them on their way. A follow-up study later showed that:

The director was heading a similar team in Africa (with a raise).

The surgeon was in the business of servicing septic tanks.

The internist was working as a carpenter building houses.

The family practice physician was running a well digging service.

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